Torture- Verizon be thy Name

Verizon Customer Service

Those of you who have known me awhile have heard my issues with Verizon’s customer service. Beginning with phone service at my apartment through charging me for DSL service when I was apparently outside the service area (which explained why it worked only intermittently) to the current travails at my new house.

I won’t recap the circus of stupidity that I had to endure to get my service installed, but instead will jump to this month’s ongoing drama.

We had a brief thunderstorm Thursday night and it was enough to knock out Verizon service in our neighborhood. I got home from work Friday night excited about the opening of college football season, but no. Still no Verizon FIOS service (TV, internet nor phone). With nothing else to do I called customer service. After two dropped calls (which I will give them the benefit of the doubt and say was my cell phone) and over an hour on hold, I get an automated message saying service is out in our area and should be back by Saturday 8:30 pm.

Grumble, grumble, but Robely and I go out Saturday evening to catch some football action at the local watering hole. We return to the house after 9pm and I check everything. Still no FIOS service. I decide to call again. This time the wait is much shorter and I reach an agent.

Verizon Customer Service (VCS): Can I have your home phone number?
Me: I give my number
VCS: Can I reach you at this number if we get cut off?
Me: um, the phone isn’t working that is why I am calling
VCS: Oh, can I have email address to send you some troubleshooting tips then?
Me: Sure, but my internet is down as well
VCS: *click*

I look at my phone in disbelief, then like a masochist, redial the number. Again, a short wait and I reach a different agent. He asks the same questions and I give the same answers. I also vent a little frustration politely and recap my efforts thus far.
VCS: I see you experienced an outage in your area and the last agent left you out of the standard tech follow up. Let me get my manager.
He puts me on hold, and comes back off and on to let me know that he is still there and checking on things.
VCS: Mr. Customer, my manager approved sending a tech out to your house Monday morning between 8 and 10, is that ok?
My eyes pop in disbelief! Only two days to wait for a FIOS tech and on a holiday Monday? My good karma must be kicking in.
Me: sure thing, thank you for your help
VCS: You have a good weekend and thanks for choosing Verizon.

Labor Day Monday. We drag ourselves out of bed earlier than humanely necessary, sit in the living room and watch the front door like hawks. My wife is definitely in the stages of internet withdrawal. Her left hand is tattooing on the couch and her right hand is going in circles, her index finger pulsing.

11:30 comes and goes. I decide I need more torturing in my life. I get to an agent surprisingly quick yet again. And again I go through the spiel regarding my phone number and email address. This latest agent has a thick Spanish accent that makes it difficult for me to catch everything he is saying.
VCS: Mr. Customer? I need to contact the dispatch in your area. They are the ones that send out the techs. Please hold.
15 minutes go by……
VCS: Mr. Customer? They say there is an outage in your area and that it should be fixed by 10pm this evening, that is why they did not dispatch a tech to your house.
Me: Why didn’t they tell me that Saturday?
VCS: Let me contact the dispatch office, please hold…..There is an outage in your area. They will send a tech when it is repaired. It should be fixed by 10:30 tonight.
Me: *sigh* ok, thank you.

Day 5 without Verizon service is now here. Nothing was working when I left the house. I am now at the point of a) torturing myself through their customer service again; b) going through their billing customer service to cancel the service or c) calling the regional manager and try and get a better idea of what is going on.